Hey there! so, i was going to do a post reflecting on 2018 etc like im sure a lot of people are doing. And though there is nothing wrong in that, i suddenly thought “why am i doing this?” when, its the kind of post that if i read it would upset me.
Im sure im not the only one who really doesn’t like new years, the reflecting on mainly all these happy things, being super positive and very “wow! life is amazing!” works for some people, and is true for some people but it just isnt me and as someone who generally crawls into the next year barely held together i dont really want to explain why im so “thankful for everything ive done this year”.
And you see everyone and there mother doing it, this year has i am much more active on instagram, instagram is covered with people reflecting over there year via pictures and stories. Great, im glad you had fun but i didn’t leave the house for 6 months, i completely gave up all hope and just resigned myself to rotting away until i finally got off the therapy waiting list and my lovely therapist swooped in and told me to pull myself together and fight for what i want.
Now of course im glad she did that, but being in that situation in the first place isnt exactly fun and games. And the thing is we are surrounded with “new year new you”, “im going to travel/train/get married/have a baby in 2019”, “try this new diet in 2019!”. Its everywhere, but honestly its not needed.
If you are crawling into 2019 feeling like you have been fighting a war all year and your going from one battlefield to another, please know that you do not have to like new years, you dont have to reflect and just being able to drag yourself into another year is something in of itself.
2018 is the first year in many years that i can happily pick out a number of positives in actually, but also a lot of negatives and a lot of hard times. But in the end? Im not going to do any of that, i am going to walk into 2019 back onto the battlefield with the rest of us, maybe with one or two less scars than before and call that a win.
while im here, its also completely fine if your not doing anything for new years! you do not have to see it in if you do not want to/cant. There is no rule saying you have too, there is way too much pressure to see in new years drunk and shouting, theres no need it doesn’t change anything. It just means that you will start the new year with a headache!, of course go ahead and have fun if you wish, but if you dont want too you dont have too!
Remember these things ok?